my friend who lives in a co op invited me and my other friend to go to a halloween party. so naturally i went all out and did like a cute costume because im at the age where halloween has become slutty. but that is not to say that it wasn’t genuinely just an earnest attempt at putting a look together because i’ve had lots of fun in the past making looks for things like fashion shows my cos school hosted. last year they had me model as chopped other mother (the girl who bought the dress apparently bought TWO polka dotted dresses and she gave me the ugly one???) i had a lot of fun planning and assembling the outfit and i would say that this was maybe the most fun halloween for me since i was like 13. at a very young age i started to feel like i was too old to participate in halloween stuff so traditionally halloween hasn’t been anything i particularly look forward to, aside from the social aspect. anyway he picked me up at like 9 pm and i was fully costumed falling asleep in his car on the way to my friend’s co op. we got there and it was actually really cool. before we went out to the party i ate a peanut butter sandwich in my friends dorm. we went to “heaven”, this weird room where they had club music or whatever playing and they were selling drinks WITHOUT carding us which is crazy because we all three either look or sound like we are 10 boys in a trenchcoat imitating adults. me personally i just have to have other people buy my drink because my voice is so ridiculously childish. which is exactly what happened. we kinda drank some and then bounced around the party until we found ourselves in this smoker lounge situation on the highest floor. now. i love a good ambient lighting situation with windows that oversees buildings but i just wasn’t feeling it even as i was smoking. my friends were talking to other people and like, and this ruins everything, i have no emotional regulation whatsoever so i was feeling like i was a 12yo autistic girl again in PE class. so i told my guy friend i was bored and i was also clearly irate and he was like you just have to socialize. Um so i got up and ran off. but not before texting my ex gf and asking her if i should. she didn’t answer my question directly but she was like it sucks that your party is going poorly
anyway so i went to heaven and danced by myself. i don’t really know how to dance, i am sort of learning through these increasingly more common opportunities that i get to do so. we always say this, but it’s like the closer you get to 21 the stronger the party instinct becomes. but my cuteness saved me. this GUY pulled me aside and started flirting with me. I went along with it for maybe 20 minutes because I was kinda mad at my friends and also this guy went and took me downstairs to get some spiked punch. he tried to invite me back to his room and i had to break the news to him. i’m Gay. I do appreciate that people in positions of power are always the ones that like me though. by positions of power i mean like fuckin Chipotle manager. it’s sad that im gay because he had these beautiful hasan piker eyes and he did this thing where he took off his sunglasses and smoldered at me and i was like i Just Know this guy pulls this shit all the time. so I went back to the punch maybe 3 or 4 times and then walked all the way to the TOP FUCKING FLOOR AGAIN to go back to my friends dorm because they went back there. we took a little break but my guy friend was pretty upset and it’s worth mentioning that I have been fighting with him all the time lately. i’ve been feeling like Beth from Rick and Morty. i ate 2 more peanut butter sandwiches
Anyway me and co op friend went back to heaven and OHHHHH shit we got down. we drank a little more i think ((??) and we got DEEOOWWN. they threw us into the dance circle and it made us look stupid because she just spun me around like a little lady and It was still really fun and that was a cute thing that happened. we went back to her dorm again after maybe 30-40 minutes to go get guy friend again presuming he was ready and he had actually gone off on his own and we went to find him. and then the party concluded in the courtyard and it as great cuz they played shit like party rock for nostalgia me and guy friend ended up running our asses down to CVS to retrieve snacks and more alcohol and it was scary because we were just walking through the city streets like people aren’t getting murdered down there. cvs was too expensive so we walked even farther to a 7-11 and we obtained dinner. i got two hot dogs. went to dorm drank more i thought to bring a change of clothes.
when we woke up i was not as hungover as my friends mysteriously. i think it’s either maybe that the alcohol wasn’t very strong because i WAS crossfaded and that would explain why i still felt something, or that it’s because i ate all that peanut butter and bread. my friends were hungover on the other hand. after we parted ways me and guy friend went to mcdonald’s and got a ridiculous feast. we like to do that when we drink UM WE FOUGHT AGAIN SIKE because i told him i talked to my ex gf before i ran off. which why does that even matter. so i went home and played tomodachi life for basically 2 days straight. and i’m coming off of my psych meds again which is good for my creative ability and it will be good for my writing but it also made me more pissed off. I actually don’t even remember how I came about neocities, i think it was from me browsing that bonnibels graphic website and i was like man i wish i had something cool like that to maintain. it has since occurred to me that it’s probably a good idea to have a blog because in the past like when i was 9 i had a blogspot and i loved that. Even though all of my posts were slop. I MADE A FUCKING MISTAKE THINKING I COULD DO HTML I HATE DEALING WITH THAT EVEN WHEN I FORMAT STUFF ON AO3 but i’ve come far enough that my site looks beautiful. I will say that i’m about to open tomodachi life again and once I manage to break the hypnosis i will get back on developing this website. happy halloween!